Writing Task 2: Problem & Solution Essay: Question 10
Syllabus W.task2
For journeys of only a mile or two, a growing proportion of people now choose to drive rather than walk, cycle or use public transport.
What problems does this growing reliance on private cars for short trips cause, and what measures could be taken to reduce it?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
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Worked solution
Examiner notes: why this is a band 9 response
Task Response
The response develops three connected problems (congestion, air quality, public health) with a school-gate statistic that ties them together concretely, then answers with two matching measures (protected cycle infrastructure and congestion charging) whose mechanism for changing short-trip behaviour specifically is spelled out rather than merely asserted. The Ashworth family example demonstrates the proposed measure working in exactly the scenario the problem paragraph described, giving the response a tightly closed argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
Topic sentences (“The most visible problem is congestion…”, “Reducing this reliance requires making the alternatives both safer and more convenient than driving”) make the structure easy to follow, and a colon is used correctly to introduce the health problem without breaking the paragraph. Reference chains (“this reliance”, “Emberton’s own protected cycle route”) link sentences smoothly without a mechanical list of transition words.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is precise and topic-appropriate (“disproportionate to the short distances”, “sedentary lifestyle”, “tilt the balance toward active travel”), with accurate, natural collocation throughout (e.g. “clog residential streets”, “perceived danger”), and no unnecessary repetition of “car” or “short”.
Grammatical Range & Accuracy
A wide range of structures is used with full control, including an appositive opening (“a habit that is reshaping towns in ways few residents actively chose”), a non-defining relative clause (“one family, the Ashworths, to abandon…”), and correctly punctuated coordinate clauses. There are no errors of tense, agreement, article use or word form anywhere in the essay.
Common pitfalls specific to this task
See commonMistakes above: the most damaging is writing generally about traffic and pollution without narrowing the discussion to short journeys specifically. A band 9 response keeps returning to why short trips in particular are the problem, since the measures needed to fix them (safe local cycling, peak-hour charging) differ from those aimed at long-distance car use.